October 22, 2009

Suspect Trees Himself, Gives Fake Identification Info

A Tennessee man recently learned the hard way that you cannot evade authorities by hiding in a tree. According to WBIR.com, the man had entered a convenience store and stuffed several beers in his clothes before walking out. When the man was confronted in the parking lot by an employee, he pulled out what appeared to be a gun and escaped. Upon searching the area in response to an armed robbery call, the police found their suspect camouflaged among the branches of a nearby tree.

Near the man, they also found beer and a BB gun, leading to the logical conclusion that this was indeed the man who had robbed the convenience store. When confronted with this evidence, the fact that he was hiding in a tree, and the fact that two witnesses placed him at the scene, the man gave the police a series of fake aliases in order to attempt to avoid prosecution. Police were able to see through the ruse, however, and have identified the suspect’s real name. His attempt at assuming a fake identity resulted in his being charged with criminal impersonation in Knoxville.

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September 29, 2009

Fake Cop Faced with Real Jail Time

Sometimes it is the little things in life that cause the most frustration. This is particularly true when it comes to automobile travel. For example, it is extremely frustrating to sit at a red light for what seems like an eternity when your car is the only car at a four-way intersection. Likewise, sitting in traffic for hours is maddening, and when a police car, lights flashing, speeds happily by your inert vehicle on its way to its destination, it is hard not to feel a twinge of envy.

A twenty-one year-old security guard from Shreveport, Louisiana, knows this feeling all too well. Growing tired of the inconveniences of civilian life, the security guard decided to take matters into his own hands. He acquired a flashing red light to place on the dash of his vehicle, armed himself with a handgun, and set out to lay waste to all would-be impediments to his absolute vehicular freedom. Unfortunately for him, one of those impediments came in the form of Shreveport’s mayor.

When the mayor saw the flashing lights coming from the car behind him, he pulled over, expecting to see a police officer pull behind him or pass. Instead, he saw the security guard go by, became suspicious, and contacted the police. Police caught up with the security guard, and determined that he was impersonating a police officer for the purpose of maneuvering unimpeded through traffic. They then seized his flashing light and handgun, arrested him, and charged him with criminal impersonation.

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